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ADear Abby, Dear Abby, my Dfeet are too Along,
AMy hair's falling out and my Brights are all wErong,
AMy friends, they all tell me they're Dno friends at Aall.
Won't you wArite me a letter, won't you Egive me a Acall?
DSigEned, "ABewildered" D E A
Bewildered, Bewildered you have no complaint.
You are what you are and you ain't,
So listen up, buster, listen up good.
Stop wishing for bad luck and knocking on wood.
Signed, ?Dear Abby.â?
Dear Abby, Dear Abby, my fountain pen leaks,
My wife hollers at me and my kids are all freaks.
Every side I get up on is the wrong side of bed.
If it weren't so expensive I'd wish I were dead.
Signed, "Unhappy"
Unhappy, Unhappy, you have no complaint.
You are what you are and you ain't,
So listen up, buster, listen up good.
Stop wishing for bad luck and knocking on wood.
Signed, ?Dear Abby.â?
Dear Abby, Dear Abby, you won't believe this
But my stomach makes noises whenever I kiss.
My girlfriend tells me it's all in my head,
But my stomache tells me to write you instead.
Signed, "Noisemaker".
Noisemaker, Noisemaker, you have no complaint.
You are what you are and you ain't,
So listen up, buster, listen up good.
Stop wishing for bad luck and knocking on wood.
Signed, ?Dear Abby.â?
Dear Abby, Dear Abby, well I never thought
That me and my girlfriend would ever get caught.
We were sittin' in the back seat just shootin' the breeze
With her hair up in curlers and her pants to her knees.
Signed, "Just Married"
Just Married, Just Married, you have no complaint.
You are what you are and you ain't,
So listen up, buster, listen up good.
Stop wishing for bad luck and knocking on wood.
Signed, ?Dear Abby.â?
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