Acordes usados
Am
Em
F
G
Bm
D
A
Cm
Ab
Eb
Bb
Dm
C
B5
D/F
Fm
Bbm
1.
Motherlover
Tom: AmMédioAm
Em
F
G
Am Oh dang, what is it dawg?
I Emforgot its FMothers Day
Am Didn't get a gift for her
EmOther plans got Fin the way
Am She'll be so disappointed
Em Damn I forFgot it too
Am This could have been avoided
EmWhat the hell are we Fgonna do?
Am My moms been so forlorn Emever since my Fdaddy left, COLD
Am No one to hold her tight Emlife has put her Fto the test
Am I know just what you mean, Emmy mom's been so Fsad and gray, WORD
Am My dad can't satisfy her in the Embedroom ever since he Fpassed away
AmHold Up, you thinkin' what I'm Emthinkin', I'm thinkin' I'm Fthinkin' too
AmSlow up, What time is it Emdawg, it's time for a Fswitcharoo
Am We both love our moms, Emwomen with grown Fwomen needs
Am I say we break 'em off, Emshow 'em how much they Freally mean
'Cause GI'm a mother lover, you're a mother lover
We should f*** each Amothers mothers, f*** each Fothers moms
I'll Gpush in that place that you came out as a baby
Ain't no doubt that Amsh** is crazy, f***in' each Fothers moms
'Cause Gevery mother's day needs a mother's night
If Amdoing it is wrong, I don't Emwanna be right F
I'm Amcallin' on you 'cause I can't Emdo it myFself
To Amme you're like a brother, so Embe my mother Flover
Am I'll be laying on the couch waitin' for you Emmom clutchin' on this Flube and roses
Am I got my digital camera, EmI'mma make your momma do a Fmillion poses
Am They will be so surprised,Em we are so Fcool and thoughtful
Am Can't wait to pork your mom, EmIm'ma be the syrup she can Fbe my waffle
AmShow'd up, my mother loves Embubble bath with Fchamomile
AmEmF
Am This is the perfect plan, Emfor a perfect Fmother's day
Am They'll have to rename this one Emall up under the Fcovers day
'Cause GI'm a mother lover, you're a mother lover
We should f*** each Amothers mothers ,f*** each Fothers moms
I'll Gpush in their place where you came out as a baby
Ain't no doubt that Amsh** is crazy, f***in' each Fothers moms, break it down
GIt would be my honor to be your new step-father
AmIt would be my honor to Fbe your new step-father
And Gwhile you're in my mother, make me another brother, Yeah
And Amwhile I'm in your mother, I'll Fnever use a rubber, Oh!
'Cause Gevery mother's day needs a mother's night
If Amdoing it is wrong, I don't Emwanna be right F
I'm Amcallin' on you 'cause I can't Emdo it myFself
To Amme you're like a brother, so Embe my mother Flover
They Gblessed us both with the gift of life
She Ambrought you in this world so Im'ma Emsex her right F
This is the Amsecond best idea that we've Emever had F
The Amchoice can be no other, Embe my mother Flover
AmHappy Mother's Day
2.
I Just Had Sex
Tom: BmAvançadoBm
G
D
A
Cm
Ab
Eb
Bb
Bm GSometimes D(ohhhhh)A Something beautiful happens in this world Bm(Akon)
You don't knowG how to express yourself so (DAnd Lonely Island)
A You just gotta sing
I just hadBm sexG and it Dfelt so Agood
Bm A woman let me pGut my p***s inDside herA
I just hadBm sexG and I'll nDever go Aback
Bm To the not havingG sex ways of the DpastA
Have you Bmever had sex? I haGve, it felt great
It fDelt so good when I dAid it with my p***s
A Bmgirl let me do it ItG literally just happened
HDaving sex could make a nice mAan out the meanest
Never gBmuess where I just came fGrom, I had sex
If I hDad to describe the feelingA, it was the best
When I Bmhad the sex, man my p*G**s felt great
And I caDlled my parents right after AI was done
Oh hBmey, didn't see you there,G Guess what I just did
Had sDex, undressed, saw herA boobies and the rest
Well sBmure, Nice of her to let you Gdo that thing
Nice of aDny girl ever. Now sAing
I just hadBm seGx and it fDelt so gAood
Bm A woman let me pGut my p***s inDside herA
Wanna tell the world
Bm To be honest, GI'm surprised she even wanted me to Ddo it
Doesn't really make seAnse But man, screw it
BmI ain't one to argue with a good thGing. She could be my wife
DThat good? The best 30 seAconds of my life
I'm so hBmumbled by a girl's abiliGty to let me do her
Cuz honestDly I'd have sex with a Apile of manure
With thaBmt in mind the soft, nice sGmelling girls better
She Dlet me wear my chain and my Aturtle neck sweater
So Bmthis one's dedicated Gto them girls
That Dlet us flop around on Atop of them
If you're Bmnear a bar, whether Gshort or tall
WeD wanna thank you all for Aletting us f**k you
She kept Bmlooking at her watch
Doesn'tG matter, have sex
But I Dcried the whole time
Doesn'tA matter, have sex
I tBmhink she might have been a racist
Doesn'tG matter, have sex
She put a Dbag on my head
Still coAunts!
I just hadBm sexG and my Ddreams came Atrue
SoBm if you had sex in the Glast 30 minutes then you're Dqualified to sing
with Ame
Final Chorus:
I just hadCm seAbx and it Ebfelt so Bbgood
Cm A woman let me Abput my p***s inEbside herBb
I just hadCm seAbx and I'll Ebnever go Bbback
Cm To the not having Absex ways of the EbpastBb
Cm Ab EbLa la la Bbla
3.
Yolo
Tom: FMédioF
Bb
Dm
C
FYou know that we are still youngBb, so don't be dumDmb
Don't trust anyone,Bb 'cause you'll only live once.
F Uh, you only lBbive once that's the motto,
Dm so take a chill pill easCe up the throttle.
Never Fgo to loud clubs 'cause it's Bbbad for your ears,
your frDmiends will all be sorry wheCn they can't hear.
And stay the hFell away from drugs 'cause they Bbnot legal,
then bury Dmall your money in the backyardC like a beagle.
'cause you should Fnever trust a bank they've been Bbknown to fail,
and never tDmravel by car or bus, Cwater, by rail.
And don't trFavel by plane and don't Bbtravel at all,
build a Dmbomb shelter basement with Ctitanium wall.
And wear titFanium suits in case piBbanos fall on 'ya,
and Dmnever go to saunas 'causCe they're crawling with piranhas.
And nFever take the stairs 'cause Bbthey're often unsafe,
you Dmonly live once, don't let itC go to waste.
FYou know that we are still youngBb, so hold on from the fDmun
Cook your meat 'till it's doneBb, 'cause you'll only live once.
F Yeah, and here's aBbnother piece of advice:
DmStay away from kids cause their Chair is filled with mad lice.
FThere's no such thing as too Bbmuch Purell.
This a Dmcautionary tale, word to CGeorge Orwell.
So don't F1980 force any plBbugs into sockets.
DmAlways wear a chastity belt and Ctriple lock it.
Then hFire a taster make him cBbheck your food for poison.
And Dmif you think your mailman is a spy tChen destroy him.
No blFankets or pajamas they can Bbchoke you in your sleep.
Two Dmwords about furniture: killiCng machines.
Board your Fwindows up the sun is Bbbad for your health.
And always Dmwear a straight jacket so youCr safe from yourself.
Uh huh, FTake no chances (no chances)
BbStop freelancing' (right now)
DmInvest in your future, don't dilute your finances (uh huh)
F401K, mBbake sure it's low risk
DmThen get some real estate (how much') 4.2%
FThirty year mortgage,
Bbthat's important, that's a great deal
DmAnd if you can't afford it, don't forge it on your last bill
FRenting is for suckers right nBbow. A dependable savings,
DmAnd you'll retire with money in Cyour account. Beast!
FYOLO, say Bbno no.
DmIsolate yourself and just roll Fsolo, be care-Bbfolo
DmYou oughta look out also stands Cfor YOLO.
FYou know that we are still youngBb. Burn the prints off your thumDmbs
Then pull out all your Bbteeth, so you can't bite your tongue.
FOnly on this earth for a short time, time
So Bbdon't go outside, cause you don't want to die,Dm die.
Just take our advice and hideBb and scream YOLO to the sky.F
You oughta look out.
4.
Finest Girl (bin Laden Song)
Tom: DmMédioDm
F
Bb
A
DmFBbA
FDminest girl I ever met in my whole life F
Wanted to take her home, make her my wife Bb
Knew she was a freak when she started talking A
She said, fuck me like we fucked Bin Laden (ooh woah) Dm
That girlF was freak
She said sBbhe wanted me to fuck her
Harder thenA the military
Fucked Bin Laden Dm
Fuck Bin Laden F
Fuck Bin Laden Bb
She wanted to fuck me
Harder then the US governAment
Fucked Bin Laden Dm
She was a freaky kind of girl F
Kept up with current events from all around the world Bb
More specifically one event
The time Osama Bin Laden got shotA in the head
She said Do meDm like that
But I couldn't track the metaphor
That said I caFn see you horny like a stegasaur
That said agaiBbn your request is so irregular
She put on a beAard, I started looking at the exit door
TDmhen a turban
Then a tunic
She said Invade Fmy cave with your special unit
I said: he wasn'Bbt in a cave, but there was no stopping
She demanded thatA I fuck her like we
FuDmcked Bin Laden
Fuck Bin Laden F
Fuck Bin Laden Bb
She wanted to fuck me
Harder then the US governAment
Fucked Bin Laden Dm
This girl requested intercourse to bring her to Fclimax
With the clinicaBbl efficiency of the assassination of Bin LAaden Dm
You're harboring a fugitive (that ass) F
My justice will be punitive (Imma smash) Bb
Night-vision, they can see us through my go-pro A
She tried to negotiate, I said thats a no-no Dm
Now I'm creeping in her bed room like go-go F
She tells me to go low then looks down
And tells me that I gotta Bb
Terrorize that pussy
Gotta terrorizAe that pussy
So I Dmdid it, improvise some crazy shit
Seal Team F69 sexecuting the hit
She said BbNow you've finished me off, throw my body in the ocean
I yell GeAronimo and took some pictures for posting
The PresiDmdent called, he said Congratulations Connor
I said Mr.F President to what do I owe this honor?
He said CBbome give me the deets in the White House Garden
I gots to Aknow how you fucked her like we
Fucked Bin Laden Dm
Fuck Bin Laden F
Fuck Bin Laden Bb
I still can't say that I see the appeal
But she wanted me to fAuck her like we fucked Bin Laden Dm
Ohh this girl insisted that that F
The way we did it was merciless and exact sanity attack Bb
Just like the now famous attack that fucked A
Osama Bin Laden Dm
5.
J*** In My Pants
Tom: FCapo 1MédioF
G
Am
FLock eyes from across the rGoom
AmDown my drink while the rhythms boom
FTake your hands, skip the nGames
AmNo need here for the silly games
FMake our way through the smGoke and crowd
AmThe club is the sky and I'm on your cloud
FMove in close as theG lasers fly
AmOur bodies touch and the angels cry
FLeave this place go baGck to yours
AmOur lips first touch outside your doors
FThe whole night what we've goGt in store
AmWhisper in my ear that you want some more
FAnd I jizz in my pants G
FThis really never happens you Gcan take my word
AmI won't apologize, that's just absurd
FMainly your fault for the way tGhat you dance
AmAnd now I jizz in my pants
FDon't tell your friends or I'll Gsay you're a slut
AmPlus it's your fault, you were rubbing my butt
FI'm very sensitive , some would say thats a plus
AmNow I'll go home and change
(carry on with this rythem)
I need a few things from the grocery
Do things alone now mostly
Left me heartbroken, not lookin' for love
Surprise in my eyes when I looked above
The checkout counter and I saw her face
My heart stood still so did time and space
Never thought that I could feel real again
But the look in her eyes said I need a friend
She turned to me that's when she said it
Looked me dead in the face, asked cash or credit
And I jizzed in my pants
It's perfectly normal
Nothing wrong with me
But we're going to need a cleanup
On aisle 3
And now I'm posed in an awkward stance
Because I jizzed in my pants
To be fair
You were flirting a lot
Plus the way you bag cans makes me
Bothered and hot
Please stop acting like you're not impressed
One more thing
I'm gonna pay by check
Last week, I saw a film
As I recall it was a horror film
Walked outside into the rain
Checked my phone and saw you rang
And I jizzed in my pants
Speeding in the street, when the red lights flash
Need to get away, need to make a dash
A song comes on that reminds me of you
And I jizz in my pants
The next day
My alarm goes off
And I jizz in my pants
Open the window and a breeze rolls in
And I jizz in my pants
When Bruce Willis was dead at the end of Sixth Sense
I jizzed in my pants
I just ate a grape
And I jizzed in my pants
I went to. . .
Ok seriously you guys, can we. . . . ok?
FI jizz right in my pGants
AmEvery time you're next to me
FAnd when we're holdinG hands
AmIts like havin sex with me
FYou say I'm premature G
AmI just call it ectasy
FI wear a rubber at allG times
AmIts a necessity
FCuz I jizz in my pants G
Am(I jizz in my pants, I jizz in my pants (x3))
FYes I jizz in my pants G
Am(I jizz in my pants, I jizz in my pants)
6.
Incredible Thoughts
Tom: GMédioG
Bm
D
Incredible thoGughts, incredible minBmds.
I'm so overwheDlmed. How did my brain conGceive them?
A Gsnow-white dove in the pitch black night,
A Bmrain drop falls from tremendous heights,
A Dwave crashes off of a cliff in Scotland,
A Gchild bites an apple, but the core is rotten.
GTV is free, but what is the cost?
We Bmhave GPS and yet, we're still lost.
A Dcarrot in the desert, a camel in the garden,
A Gman with giant ears begging your pardon.
GWhat if a garbage man was actually smart? (What if?)
A Bmcommon misconception that we're tearing apart.
And to a Ddog, dog food is just food,
And to a Gsock, a mansion's just a big shoe.
G A milk dud, sitting in the acid rain.
Bm A house cat addicted to the cocaine.
D No teeth; unlimited floss.
GThese are just a few of our incredible thoughts.
InGcredible thoughts, incredible minds,
BmToo many great ideas inside.
It's a Dmiracle my head can contaGin them.
My spectacular Gbrain for all humankind,
BmChanging how we think about space and time.
DNow it's time to share them with the peGople, oh!
(So incredible!)
A Gballerina waits for the bus.
A BmNumber One Dad trophy covered in rust.
An Dnun dunked a basketball, living the impossible.
A Gman breaks his leg inside a hospital.
G We just thought of that, and it can change the world.
Bm We're like a smart oyster full of pearls,
Such aDs an ultrasound of a new baby
With a Santa Ghat drawn on. Yeah! That's my kind of Christmas card!
G What if a butterfly was made out of butter?
BmThese small thoughts could destroy Big Brother!
The Dworld's cutest kitten just hugging a dog.
Just Gone of many of our incredible thoughts.
Middle
BmWhat if one thought could cure the people?
DWhat if one song could end all evil?
IBmmagine if a fish could play guitar
And Galso sing; it would sound bizarre, like:
BmMy name is Mr. Fish.
DThese guys' thoughts have granted my wish. (Oh, yeah!)
And Bmthat may have just changed the course of time.
I Gswear my mind blows my mind.
N.C.
(Incredible...)
InGcredible thoughts, incredible minds,
BmToo many great ideas inside.
It's a Dmiracle my head can contaGin them.
My spectacular Gbrain for all humankind,
BmChanging how we think about space and time.
DNow it's time to share them with the peGople.
My brain is a Ggenius!
Incredible thoGughts, incredible minBmds.
I'm so overwheDlmed. How did my brain conGceive them?
7.
Rocky
Tom: BbAvançadoCm
Eb
Bb
D
Note - Bb is played on theCm 8tEbh fBbretCm.
HCmere's a little story that I think you'll like
IEbt's not about Shaq or Iron Mike
SBbo buckle your seatbelts, it's gonna get choppy
ACmnd listen to the tale of the time I fought Rocky
OCmne day me and all my friends were hangin'
TEbalkin' 'bout which of the girls was most bangin'
TBbhen one friend says, "You know who's really tough?
"CmRocky, " (hit me home) "the boxer." Man
(Just those chords all through the rest of the song)
I said, "Yeah I know him. What about him? " He said
"He's really tough." "No way, man. I'm calling your bluff
"I think that I can take him and, to prove my point
"I'll challenge him in public." (Yeah, that's the joint!)
So the very next day, stayed true to my word
And I snuck on T.V. so I could be heard
I said, 'Rocky, if you're out there, I think you're a nerd
"And I'll lick you and bury you like a dog turd! "
I got kicked out, but the candle was lit
Cause the people had to know if my claim was legit
It made the headlines and I got the call
It was Rocky ("Hey") and he wanted to brawl
We negotiated terms and set the date
Then I went into training to add some muscle weight
While I punched on meat in a rickety shack
He was sippin' on wine, having models rub his back
At the weigh-in, boy the tension was high
Me and Rock, toe-to-toe and eye-to-eye
I talked some trash, we got pulled apart
I shot him one last look to strike fear in his heart
Skip ahead, the big night was finally here
My body was ripped and my mind was clear
We entered the arena to the roar of the crowd
People chantin' my name - I never felt so proud
Faced off once more in the center of the ring
Touched gloves, said a prayer and the bell went ding
He hit me with a left and shattered my face
And a right sent my teeth all over the place
Then another great punch caved-in my eye socket
He broke my jaw and my trainer yelled, "Stop it! "
But nobody heard him and he crushed my ribs
Blood sprayed off my face and onto some kids
They yelled out, "More! " and Rocky obliged
I had to think of some way to turn the tides
So I leaned back to hit him with all of my might
Took a swing, but he caught me with a sucker punch right
Then a sucker punch left and a sucker punch right
Then twenty-two consecutive sucker punch rights
He tore off my arms and beat me with 'em
Then threw acid in my face which obscured my vision
He kicked me in the leg and fractured my shin
The bone splinters shot right out of my skin
People barfed in the crowd; they were going insane
And Rocky punched my nose-bone into my brain
I was quivering and twitching when I soiled my shorts
Then Rocky pissed on me (customary in sports)
The doctor came out and pronounced me dead
And that was the night I fought Rocky
D
8.
Boombox
Tom: EmCapo 1AvançadoEm
G
Am
B5
D
D/F
A
IEmmagine in your mind a posh Gcountry club
The Amstuffy old money where the B5poor get Dsnubbed
TEmhe spread is bland sauerGkraut and boiled goose
There's Amno way these people will B5ever cut Dloose
But then I Emwalk in the room, hold my Gboombox high
And Amwhat happened next, will B5blow your Dmind
EmEverything got outta conAmtrol
The Dmusic was so entGrancing D/F
EmEveryone got out on the Amfloor
It was a Dbunch of old white people Gdancing D/F
The EmBig Apple, where Gpeople never dance
AmSpirits go down while B5profits exDpand
The Emcops or the dealers, who's Ggot the juice
The Amstreet vendors peddling their B5boiled Dgoose
So Emmany types of people will Gnever get along
Till I Ambust out my boombox and B5play this Dsong
EmThe music washed away all the Amhate
And soDciety started aGdvancing D/F
Every Emdemographic was repreAmsented
It was a Drainbow coalition of Gdancing D/F
EmWhoa Am
DEveryone was wearing Gfingerless gD/Floves
EmWhoah Amoh
I saw a DSpanish guy doing the GBartman D/F
EmTransport now to an Gold folks home
Where the Amelderly are tossed on their B5brittle Dbones
The Emorderlies are stealing, there's Gno excuse
AmEveryday for lunch they eat B5boiled Dgoose
So I Emgrabbed my boombox and hit the Gturbo base
And Amwhat happened next was a B5total disDgrace
EmEverybody started having Amsex
The Dmusic was way too GpowerfulD/F
A bunch of Emold people fucking like Amrabbits
It was disDgusting to say the Gleast, D/Foh
A Emboombox can change the Amworld
You gotta Dknow your limits with a Gboombox D/F
EmThis was a cautionary Atale
A Dboombox is not a Gtoy D/F
EmGAmB5D
Em
9.
Do The Creep
Tom: FmAvançadoFm
Bbm
C
Cm
FmWhen you?re out at a club and you see a fly girl
do the creep (haaaa)
do the creep (haaaa)
BbmAnd if you wanna make friends at the ATM
CDo the creep (haaaa)
CmAnd do the creep (haaaa)
FmWell we got a new dance, so get up on your feet
It?s real easy to do and it?s called the creep
BbmLet your hands flop round like a marionette
CPop your knees up and down Cmsh-sh-shakin? your neck
FmNow pull your waistband up like you expecting a flood
And stick your hair down flat like it was covered in mud
BbmTrim up your pencil mustache and pop them peepers
CPut this in your speakers, Cmyou a certified creeper
FmWhen you see a country bitch laying out at the beach
Do the creep (haaaa)
And do the creep (haaaa)
BbmAnd when a fine PYT walks in front of your tree
Cdo the creep (haaaa)
CmAnd do the creep (haaaa)
FmI was six years old when I started creeping
My parents took it to their room and I started peeping
BbmCan you imagine their surprise when they lifted their heads
CAnd saw my little ass creeping Cmat the foot of the bed
FmAnd they knew I was a creep since the day I was born
Get popping out of momma like some kettle corn
BbmAnd the doctor saw my head and he starting freaking
CCause I came clean and I Cmcame out creeping
FmWhen I was a girl, I creeped in the boys locker room
Hide deep inside, it was my little creep stalker room
BbmAs they dis-robed I was oogling and oggling
CLittle did they know Cmthat for me they was modelling
FmAnd I would laugh ha ha ha ha ha haha
And they would dance la la la la lalala-laaa
BbmSo pop pop pop your peepers and turn out your sneakers
CDon?t sleep, come and Cmget ya creep on with me
FmGo get ya sweating off ya bride at her wedding
do the creep (haaaa)
And do the creep (haaaa)
BbmBut when you sneek into a wake and you see a beefcake
CDo the creep (haaaa)
CmAnd do the creep (haaa)
FmWhen the judge is a hottie and you can?t control ya body
Do the creep (haaaa)
And do the creep (haaa)
BbmSo get ya knees flexin? and your arms T-rexin?
CDo the creep (haaaa)
CmAnd do the creep (haaa)
10.
I'm On A Boat
Tom: AmMédioAm
C
F
G
AmAww , get your towels ready it's about to go down shorty, yeah
CEverybody in the place hit the deck shorty, yeah
FBut stay on your toes
GWe running this, let's go
AmI'm on a boat I'm on a boat ; I'm on a boat I'm on a boat
CEverybody look at me 'cause I'm sailing on a boat sailing on a boat
FI'm on a boat I'm on a boat ; I'm on a boat
GTake a good hard look at the boat boat, yeah
AmI'm on a boat take a look at me
CStraight flowing on a boat on the deep blue sea
FBusting five knots, wind whipping out my coat
GYou can't stop me cause I'm on a boat
AmTake a picture, trick trick ; I'm on a boat,
CWe drinking Santana champ, cause it's so crisp crisp
FI got my swim trunks and my flippie-floppies
GI'm flipping burgers, you at Kinko's straight flipping copies
AmI'm riding on a dolphin, doing flips and
CThe dolphin's splashing, getting everybody all wet
FBut this ain't Seaworld, this is real as it gets
GI'm on a boat, , don't you ever forget
AmI'm on a boat and it's going fast and
CI got a nautical themed pashmina afghan
FI'm the king of the world, on a boat like Leo
GIf you're on the shore, then you're sure not me-oh
Spoken Andy
Get the up, this boat is REAL!!!
Am land, I'm on a boat,
C trees, I climb buoys,
FI'm on the deck with my boys, yeah
GThis boat engine make noise,
AmHey ma, if you could see me now see me now
CArms spread wide on the starboard bow starboard bow
FGonna fly this boat to the moon somehow moon somehow
GLike Kevin Garnett, anything is possible
AmYeah, never thought I'd be on a boat
CIt's a big blue watery road yeah
FPoseidon
GLook at me, oh all hands on deck
AmNever thought I'd see the day
CWhen a big boat coming my way
FBelieve me when I say
GI a mermaid
AmI'm on a boat; I'm on a boat
CEverybody look at me 'cause I'm sailing on a boat woaah
FI'm on a boat; I'm on a boat
GTake a good hard look at the ' boat sha-sha-shorty, shorty, yeah